To see your smile
by saphira404
Summary: My name is Kagura and I am a servant in Lord Sesshomarou’s castle. Since the night he saved me, I think I’ve been in love with him. But could he ever love me back? Rated M for language and citrus.
1. Unconventional meeting

Hello dear readers of mine

Hello dear readers of mine. I decided to challenge myself with this mini story. I hope you will enjoy it! It should have around five or six parts, and I will do my best to post one part a day.

_Summary:__ My name is Kagura and I am a servant in Lord Sesshomarou's castle. Since the night he saved me, I think I've been in love with him. Could he ever love me back? Rated M for citrus._

_**TO SEE YOUR SMILE**_

**_Disclaimer:_** Inuyasha and all its great characters do not belong to me.

_**Part I: Unconventional meeting**_

My name is Kagura, if I had to describe myself, I'd say I'm pretty cute and funny. I was always a playful child, and I had an okay childhood that is until my mother died. Maybe it's because I reminded him too much of her, but from that point on my father started treating me like his personal slave, while my older sister Kanna was his precious little treasure. He took great care of her and she never had to lift a finger to do anything around the house.

When I turned seventeen, my dear father Naraku sold me as a servant to our Lord to pay off his debts. Of course it never crossed his mind to give away his precious Kanna.

To be honest working in the castle was not so bad, Contrary to how it was back home, I was well fed and as long as I did what was asked of me quickly, I also had lots of time to rest or have fun with the other girls.

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It had been three months since I came to the castle when my life changed completely. I was on laundry duty that day, after spending hours folding all the bed sheets; I had to go put them in one of the storage rooms.

Since the sun was setting when I finished my daily tasks, I decided it was time to relax and taking a nice stroll in the many gardens would just do the trick. The little walk took longer than I expected, and by the time I was heading back towards the servants' quarters in the castle it was already dark.

While I was walking back, I stopped for a minute to admire the beautiful crescent shaped moon; which proved to be a very bad idea, when I heard footsteps behind me. I did not have time to turn around that I felt someone grabbing me by the waist and backing me up against a wall. I tried to scream but a second person appeared and put his hand above my mouth, to muffle my screams for help.

I concentrated and tried to summon my winds to push them off of me, but to my horror nothing happened.

"Ku ku ku wind sorceress, I also wield power over the winds, therefore you won't get away from us" the man who was pushing me against the wall said, as his accomplice licked my cheek.

I started crying when I felt them untie my obi and open up my red and white simple kimono to reveal my white under garments. I could not believe that I who saved myself for my true love would lose my virginity to some heartless brutes whose faces I could not even see.

I was so afraid that I did no hear a third man coming towards us. Thankfully neither did the two men who were trying to rape me. Therefore when the third mysterious man finally spoke, my two rapists were so startled that they let go of me, which gave me enough time to close my kimono and try to get away.

Unfortunately I was not fast enough, as one of the rapists grabbed me forcefully by the arm, and backed me up against his chest.

"What are you doing?" the new comer asked on a deep and rich voice.

"Don't worry, as soon as we're done with the bitch, you can have a go with her too." I heard one of the rapists say on such a dismissive tone that I almost threw up in my mouth. As if to emphasize his words, the one holding me down, squeezed one of my breasts.

"You disgusting pathetic creatures, let go of her at once. This Sesshomarou shall not allow such behavior as rape to go on in his castle without punishment". The new man said as I heard a metallic sound that resembled someone unsheathing a sword resonate.

The man who was grabbing me, let go and I quickly took the opportunity to tie my obi properly.

For an unknown reason, the two rapists kneeled in front of the new man and said "Please forgive us milord" I heard one of them say.

"She was consenting, milord, I swear. But please forgive us we should have gone to a more private place." I recognize the voice of the man who had invited him to join them.

"Is this true?" the man with the deep voice asked, I presumed he was talking to me, even if he wasn't I would not let those two rapists say such lies about me.

"The hell it is! They grabbed me when I was walking back to the castle and tried to force themselves on me" I said crossing my arms. The newcomer was still standing in the shadows and I could not see his face. But by the way he spoke and coupled with the fact that the two rapists kneeled in front of him, I bet he's a pretty important man.

"You dare lie to this Sesshomarou?" The man than let a humorless chuckle and continued "In my jurisdiction, the penalty for rape is death" the man said on such a cold tone that it sent shivers down my spine. "Guards!" he then screamed and two armored men appeared out of nowhere. And where were they when I screamed for help?!

"Take them to the dungeons, they shall be punished for attempted rape on…" he then asked as if it was an after thought "what is your name?"

"Kagura Onigumo" . Not wasting any more time the guards grabbed the two men and lead them towards a staircase which us servant were not allowed to even come close to.

"Go back to your room" the mysterious man then said as he turned around.

"Wait!" I screamed after him, he stopped but did not bother to turn around. I gulped and asked "What is your name?"

He turned around, and at this precise moment the moon bathed his handsome face in a surreal glow. He was so beautiful that by only staring at him I felt my knees go weak and my heart started beating so fast that it was painful. With his long silver white hair whipping around his face, and his golden eyes looking at me, he looked so ethereal. I also notice he had demonic markings, which means he must be a pretty strong demon.

"My name is Lord Sesshomarou" he said after a minute of simply looking at me. And then it hit me, he was my master! I felt so stupid, that I could have slapped myself. He must have felt my discomfort, for he stepped towards me and asked "did they hurt you?"

"No you arrived just in time" I somehow managed to say, despite the dryness of my throat. I then bowed my head and said "Thank you for saving me Lord Sesshomarou".

He turned around and walked back towards where he was coming from, I don't know if it was just my imagination, but I swear I heard him murmur 'Kagura'.

(A/N: So how was part one? Yay or Nay? Tell me what you think. Part two will be named **New assignment **and will be posted soon).


	2. New assignment

(A/N: Here's part 2, hope you will enjoy)

(A/N: Here's part 2, hope you will enjoy)

Thank you for reviewing:

**Sychotic**

**Strgrl4eva**

_**Part II: New assignment**_

**Disclamier: **If I owned Inuyasha it would not be a FANfiction!

The next morning, my life resumed its course as if nothing happened. I did not tell any of my comrades about what had happened near the garden, and how the supposed cold, insensitive and fearsome Lord Sesshomarou had rescued me from rape just in the nick of time.

That day I was assigned to help in the kitchen. I always enjoyed food, so helping by peeling vegetables and getting to taste the dishes was why the kitchen had always been my favorite of all assignments.

My least favorite assignment had always been floor scrubbing. Spending an entire day on all fours always gave me such a horrible back ache. Even if contrary to some of my comrades, I am a demoness and therefore have more endurance, and physical strength, floor scrubbing was and will always be torture.

A soon as I entered the kitchen, I noticed that we were under staffed. And once I paid more attention I noticed that most of the women still here were youkai. I did not have time to ponder on the matter, that Kaede the old head of the kitchen gave me my daily assignments, which included cooking the vegetables.

Did I mention that I am not a great cook, but I knew that there was no one else to do it, so I'll just have to do my best. Hopefully Lord Sesshomarou would not behead me for over cooked vegetables. According to the different rumors I heard around the castle I would not put it past him.

But I have to admit that the Sesshomarou I saw last night was so different from what I heard everyone say about him. Maybe he was just tired, or maybe no one really knows the real Sesshomarou…

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Once we finished serving lunch and were busy washing the dishes, a toad like imp came screaming in the kitchen, asking every cook who had been responsible for the vegetables. I felt my blood turn to ice in my veins, for sure Lord Sesshomarou would have me killed. I just hoped I did not poison his precious daughter Rin.

Fearing for my own well being, I tried to get out through the back door, maybe I'd have time to make it out of the castle before being caught. But of course I had no such luck, as I heard the old Kaede call my name.

I did not even notice that the toad demon was now planted right in front of me, I almost stepped on him, which I have to admit I would have found amusing. Anyway he gestured for me to follow him, which I did.

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We walked through several corridors, and ended up in a part of the castle that I had yet to reach. It had a large garden in the middle of which stood a beautiful fountain encircled by multi colored flowers. I was shocked beyond words, to see that none other than Sesshomarou was sitting under the shade of a tree, one of his arms carelessly resting on his raised left knee. I noticed he was watching over a little girl who was picking up flowers, a few feet away from us.

"Kagura" Sesshomarou said I winced when I realized he remembered my name. MY name!

"Yes Sesshomarou?" I asked as I got closer.

"You impetuous wench, how dare you address the lord in such a way? And how dare you stand higher than him?!"

I would have retorted something to the imp, something around the lines of 'it sure as hell easy for you not to stand higher than him, even when he is sitting on the ground' but Sesshomarou beat me to it and raised two long clawed fingers. And then the annoying toad demon was gone.

It was not Sesshomarou who spoke next but the little girl who came skipping towards us, she handed me the flowers she had just picked and said "Father is that her?"

"Yes Rin" the lord answered, I noticed he did not even give his daughter a glance as he spoke. Rin really did not look like her father, they did have the same golden eyes, except that hers were filled with joy and warmth the complete opposite of Sesshomarou's cold eyes. Rin had dark brown hair, I guess it must have been the late Lady Sara's hair color.

"Why is it that you wanted to see me?" I could not help but ask.

"From now on, you shall take care of Rin" Sesshomarou said still staring into space.

"I fail to see what the connection is between cooking vegetables and getting a promotion". I knew that being Rin's care taker was a very coveted position, and since her former babysitter left two weeks ago, all the young servants in the castle only hoped for one thing: get the position. The reason was that Rin's care taker had one of the highest status among the servants. She would get her own room and her only duties are looking after Rin.

"Rin never eats her vegetables. But yours were so good, Rin never tasted anything like it. Rin even ate two servings" I don't know if I was more shocked by the fact that she referred to herself at the third person, or by the fact that she actually enjoyed MY cooking.

"Thanks, I guess" I whispered.

"You start immediately" Sesshomarou said before graciously getting up and walking away. He was so handsome I could not help but stare as he walked away.

"Miss Kagura what do you want to play?" the little girl asked me with bubbling eyes snapping me out of my daze. I have to admit it was the first time anyone talked to me with such respect. Maybe taking care of her would not be so bad.

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It had been a little over a month since I started taking care of Rin and I have to admit I love this kid. She is so sweet and so bright, and so playful; I never get bored when I'm with her. Okay she can really be a chatter box and sometimes I just want to shut her up. But most of the time she is a real angel.

Which begs the question of how she can be Lord Sesshomarou's daughter. Unfortunately, I have not seen much of him during the past month. Sometimes he comes in and sits next to me while I watch Rin collect flowers.

Every time he sits next to me I feel a tingling sensation running through my body and I feel unbearably hot. He does not speak a word just stares at Rin with a blank expression on his face, then gets up and leave.

Once I tried to start up a conversation:

"Rin is lovely"

"…." Okay I knew he was not the talkative type. But I am not the type of person to give up easily.

"This is a beautiful garden, did you have it build for her?"

"Yes" Wow! He just talked to me! Let's see if he can use more than three words.

"That was really nice of you"

"…" Too bad and I thought we were making progress. Suddenly he turned and looked straight in my eyes, and left me breathless. I did my best not to blink and maintain his gaze.

"Kagura, it is time for Rin's lesson" I wished he would have talked to me about something else, but he said a full sentence to me, that's good enough right?

I never tried to start a conversation with him again. When he sits next to me, while we watch Rin, at lest I can look at him freely from the corner of my eye. I don't know if he knows I'm staring at him, but even if he did what would or could he do about it? Every time I see him I find him even more handsome and intriguing.

Very often Sesshomarou sits in during Rin's lessons, I guess he just wants to assess her progress or something like that. He may not talk to her much, but you can tell he loves his daughter more than anything. He may not be the best father in the world, but he does a hell of a better job than Naraku ever did.

Every night, after I put Rin to bed Sesshomarou comes to see her. I often stood outside the doors and sometimes I hear them talk, once I swear I even heard him chuckle, or maybe it was just my imagination.

After that night I often found myself wondering why Sesshomarou never laughed or even smiled. Maybe he just needs reason to smile, I hope that one day I will be his reason to smile.

(A/N: Here's the end of part 2. In the next part it's Rin's birthday. Part three will be called **Birthday**).


	3. Birthday

(A/N: Here comes part 3 hope you like it)

(A/N: Here comes part 3 hope you like it)

Thank you for reviewing:

**Sychotic**

_**Part III: Birthday **_

_**Disclaimer:**_ If I owned Inuyasha, Kagura would have been revived and be Sesshy's mate!

In the few months I spent here, I had never seen the castle in such excitement. Everyone from the guards to the maids was working full time. And the reason behind all this agitation was Rin's seventh birthday.

Of course my job as Rin's care taker forced me to assist in the preparation of the festivities. Yesterday I had to help audition the many music players who presented themselves hoping to be employed by the wealthy Lord of the Western Lands, after hearing about the party.

From dawn until dusk I had to listen to different kinds of music, and by the end of the day I was nursing the biggest headache I ever had in my life. It's not that their music was not enjoyable, it's just that anything in excess is harmful, as my mother used to say.

It sure promised to be one hell of a party. Invitations were sent to every young member of the nobility in the country.

The birthday girl in question did not seem as excited as I figured she would be. If I did not know any better, I would even say she was pretty depressed. My little Rin as I like to call her was once again sitting in her garden. The garden with the fountain where I saw her for the first time, that was built just for her.

For once I did not find her picking up flowers but staring down at her reflection in the fountain's clear water.

"Are you okay my little Rin"

She did not even smile back at me or take her yes of her reflection. For a second I thought that she did not even hear me. But after a while she finally spoke:

"He says I look just like her" Rin had on her face the saddest expression I ever saw painted on it.

"Every time I ask him what she was like, he says she was pretty. Does that mean I'm pretty too?"

"Of course you are" I answered not quite sure who she was talking about. I then took her in my arms, like I usually do when she has a nightmare and kissed her fore head. I don't know exactly what the matter is with her but I remember that when I was pretty down my mother would kiss my forehead and everything would feel so much better.

"You want to tell me what's wrong Rin?" I finally ask. Her answer was soaking the front of my kimono with her hot tears. I gently held her and rocked her against my chest trying to whisper comforting words to her.

"You know you can tell me anything right Rin?" I finally ask, as she stopped sobbing.

"I hate this day!" she exclaimed. I wondered if she was talking about her birthday. But that would be ridiculous, why would she hate her own birthday?

"Are you talking about your birthday?" She only nodded and the tears started falling feely again.

"Can I ask you why?" I ask her after she stopped crying.

"It's the same day she died. It was all my fault"

"I don't understand. Who are you talking about?" I finally asked her as I held her chin to force her to look at me.

"My mother, she died when I was born. I killed her." I was shocked no one ever told me that the late Lady of the Western Lands died in childbirth. I guess it explains a lot about our Sesshomarou.

"Don't you ever say that, you did not kill her. Those kind of things happen, it's fate. I bet your father would never forgive you for saying or even thinking such a thing". I told her trying to comfort her as much as I could.

"It is because of me that father is always so sad. I always laugh and smile, I try to make him laugh and smile but it does not work. Every year around my birthday he stops talking to me, he stays in his study all day long, I think I remind him too much of her".

I was stunned to hear that, but I had to admit that during the past week or so I haven't seen much of Sesshomarou. He did not even come to Rin's garden after lunch. Hell he did not even eat with her anymore. I may not have noticed these changes, but I am sure that Rin did, and it must be why she had been so down lately.

"Rin the reason why your father is in his study is that he's working very hard. One of the guards told me that there are tensions between the Western and Eastern Lands. Lord Sesshomarou is just trying to avoid a war.

"Really?" she asked me wiping her tears, a small smile on her lips.

"Of course, and if he sees how sad you are he will be worried. So why don't you get happy and start working on your party. Come on let's go in the kitchen and sample some dishes" I told her tugging on her arm as to get her to come along with me.

"Jaken won't like that I went to the kitchen" Rin said sniffling loudly.

I smiled and said "All the more reasons to go ahead". My teasing was rewarded by Rin's laughter ringing in my ears as we raced to the kitchen.

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I was sure it was a bad idea, but I had to do it. He needed to know about his daughter's suffering. Wasn't it part of my job description to take care of her mental well being as well?

If only I could find Sesshomarou's room, things would get a hell of a lot easier. I had been running in circles in the whole castle for a good hour, when I decided to give up. I found it pretty weird that despite the fact that I have been living in the castle for several months. I had no idea where Lord Sesshomarou's bedroom was located.

As I was retreating to my bedroom, I found a staircase that I had never noticed before. I focused and used my demon sense of smell as best as I could. Unfortunately unlike the lord's family I am not a dog demon so my senses are not that great, but then again they are not as dull as a human senses'.

I would have recognized this scent anywhere it was Sesshomarou. His scent was a wonderful mix of pine and fresh water. He always smelt so clean and fresh, and his scent was so addictive. Just like a cold river in the middle of a hot summer afternoon. After you put your hand in it, you just want one thing, and one thing only to jump in the water and immerse yourself it its coolness. It was the same for me and Sesshomarou, after I got to spend a little time with him I only wanted more.

Anyway, so I went up the hidden stair case and down a long dark corridor that ended in a large and imposing door. I stood there for a while afraid of knocking. What if Sesshomarou was in a bad mood and decided to cut me down to pieces, before I even started talking?

I was about to turn around when the door opened and Sesshomarou came out. I am sure I became beet red when I noticed he was only wearing his hakama. It took all of my will power to avert my eyes from his bare chest and look into his eyes. For the first time I saw a look of surprise playing in the usually cold golden eyes.

"What are you doing here Kagura?" his words snapped me out of my daze and after exhaling a shaky breath I finally said "I wish to talk to you".

For the longest time he did not move, but just stared at me, which caused shivers to run down spine and my knees to feel weak. Then he suddenly turned around and entered his room. I thought he did not want to talk to me, but then I heard him say "why are you still out there, come in".

His bedroom was the most beautiful and richly decorated room in the castle. Sesshomarou was sitting on his futon and looking at me, waiting for me to finally give the reason I came to his room in the middle of the night. Any other man could have had the wrong idea and infer I wanted to sleep with him. But of course not Sesshomarou and I would not expect any less from him.

But as I saw him get up and get dangerously close from me I wondered if I was wrong about him. He stopped in front of me and looked straight in front of my eyes as he asked "what have you come here for wind witch?"

He was so close to me I could feel the heat radiating from his gorgeous body. I was about to answer him, when he bent towards my face and I could feel his hot breath on my cheek, and my voice left me.

Sesshomarou than raised his hand and…

**To be continued!!**

(A/N: Please forgive me, I know most of you are pissed for the way I ended part 3. Part 4 will soon be here so don't hit me (unless it is with a review LOL!) Part 4 will be named **Fever.**)


	4. Fever

Part IV: Fever

_**Part IV: Fever**_

_**Disclaimer: **_I don't think I look like Rumiko Takahashi , so I guess I don't own Inuyasha.

_His bedroom was the most beautiful and richly decorated room in the castle. Sesshomarou was sitting on his futon and looking at me, waiting for me to finally give the reason I came to his room in the middle of the night. Any other man could have had the wrong idea and infer I wanted to sleep with him. But of course not Sesshomarou and I would not expect any less from him._

_But as I saw him get up and get dangerously close from me I wondered if I was wrong about him. He stopped in front of me and looked straight in front of my eyes as he asked "what have you come here for wind witch?"_

_He was so close to me I could feel the heat radiating from his gorgeous body. I was about to answer him, when he bent towards my face and I could feel his hot breath on my cheek, and my voice left me._

_Sesshomarou than raised his hand and_ removed a flower petal from my hair, before straightening his back and turning around and going back to sit on his futon.

I was startled by his action, but somehow managed to quickly recollect my self. I cleared my throat and tried to ignore the anxiety growing inside me at his scrutiny of me. After what felt to me like an eternity, I finally managed to speak "I wish to speak to you about Rin".

"What about her?" he asked.

"She told me something today that, worried me."

He corked an eyebrow, and nodded as if he was encouraging me to go on.

"She told me she felt like she killed her mother and that you hated her for it" I managed to say in one breath.

At these words Sesshomarou's expression darkened, I saw what I think was a mix of sorrow and fear flash through his eyes.

His voice was hoarse when he finally spoke "did she tell you that". I nodded even if I was aware that he knew it was true.

"Where could she have got such an idea?" I was sure he was talking more to himself than to me but I figured I might help.

"She feels like around her birthday you spend less time with her. She thinks that it is because she reminds you of Lady Sara".

Sesshomarou looked thoughtful for a minute before turning towards me and said "This Sesshomarou appreciates your concern about Rin's well being."

I smiled, I guess it was his way to thank me. I felt brave and bold tonight, so I decided to ask "Lady Sara died in childbirth right?"

"Yes" Looks like we are back to one word answers.

"I'm sorry" I really was sorry, it must have been tough to lose your wife and have to take care of the child she left behind alone. Maybe it is what made Sesshomarou so cold and unfeeling?

"It is fine, it was a long time ago" Sesshomarou said with a shrug.

"Still it must have been hard, to lose the woman you love." I pressed on.

Sesshomarou looked like he wanted to say something then he sighed and said "it was an arranged marriage, she was only a friend of mine".

I was surprised by his enigmatic answer and asked before thinking "didn't you love her?!'

"Do you need help to get back to your room?" Sesshomarou asked me and I took the hint that he did not want the conversation to go on.

I was ready to decline but I remembered how tricky it had been to get here in the first place, and also in which circumstances Sesshomarou and I had met". But since I figured he would need time to think about what I just said, I shook my head. But somehow he must have felt my uncertainty, because he got up and tied his kimono before saying "I shall accompany you back to your quarters".

I was immensely grateful and walked silently behind him. We arrived in front of my room in five minutes, and he left me without saying a word.

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I have not seen Rin since breakfast, her father called for her and she has yet to return. I just hope they'll have a long nice talk. For some reason the idea of Sesshomarou having a long talk with someone sent me in an incredible fit of laughter. I was laughing so hard that I could barely breathe. I guess I had to be grateful that I was in the gardens, because if anyone saw me they would think I'm mental or something.

I managed to stop laughing and was sitting against the base of a tree making a soft breeze go around. Waiting for my little Rin to come back from whatever she was doing.

As I started to doze off under the warm afternoon sun, I heard loud voices inside coming from the castle. I could make out the words "help" and "fever".

I figured that another castle inhabitant was infected with the weird illness that was touching the human habitants of the castle. For the past months some kind of disease that manifested itself by a strong fever was going through the castle. It infected almost all of the very few humans who worked at the castle.

There had not been any deaths, but people were afraid of catching it, so they begged lord Sesshomarou to let them leave the castle, which he did. I guess it is because he does not really like having humans in his castle anyway.

I was surprised by the commotion in the castle. So I decided to go take a look. As soon as I entered I saw servants running around the place. It appeared as if they were running around not knowing what exactly to do.

I managed to stop a snake youkai who I think worked in the garden.

"What's going on?" I ask him

"Misssss Kagura, it'ssss Misss Rin, she izzz infected wizzzz the fever…"

I could not believe my ears. So far the disease only touched humans. How could it be that Rin, a full blooded dog demoness could be infected? I don't know how but I soon found myself in front of Rin's room. There were so many people standing around the door that I could not come any closer.

I was really getting annoyed, as fear started to spread through me. So I decided to send a gust of wind to help me force my way in. The people who my wind pushed were reading to scream at me, but as soon as they recognize me they dared not say a word.

I finally managed to get in front of Rin's door, as I was about to push the shoji screen, open I realized that none other than Jaken was 'guarding' the door, as if he could prevent anyone from entering.

"Wench, why do you want to enter? Milord said not to disturb him."

"Get away toad, I want to see Rin"

"What can you do? She is with the doctor"

There was no denying that the imp was right. What could I do? None the less, I needed to see Rin, and I could care less if it meant disobeying the lord's wishes.

Not bothering to answer the toad, I pushed him away with a gust of wind and entered the room. I closed the shoji screen behind me, and once I turned around was not surprised to see that Sesshomarou was looking at me. But his eyes did not have the same intense look they usually had.

I gently stepped next to the futon and started to use a wet piece of cloth to cool Rin down. The doctor looked at me, it was as if he was afraid to say any more, for as long I was in the room.

I was about to justify my being here, but Sesshomarou simply said "Rin called for her". Hearing this I almost cried. There was my little Rin resting on the sheet, her feverish skin looked so pale and dark circles were forming under her usually sparkling golden eyes.

"I am deeply sorry Milord, but there is nothing I can do. This illness is beyond my understanding. But since all the humans that were infected made a full recovery, I do not believe there is any reason to worry." The doctor than bowed and left the room leaving me with only Sesshomarou.

We stayed in silence for the longest time, but then I could not take it and asked "the illness only affected humans. How is it that Rin became sick? I mean she is a youkai."

"For the most part only" Sesshomarou answered. I could tell he did not want to talk about it, but I'll be damned if I would not do my best to get answers.

"Meaning?" I too can answer in less than three words sentences.

"Her mother was a half demon, therefore making Rin a quarter human".

"I see". We then stayed in silence. The only sound was the sound of sloshing water, as I wet the cloth to cool down my poor little Rin.

Hours must have gone by, I could not tell. Sesshomarou barely moved, he stood there looking at Rin, I wondered if he even blinked. After a long time I felt as if Rin's condition was worsening, her body felt hotter under my skin and her breathing became labored.

I looked at Sesshomarou and did not miss the look of fear and panic in his eyes. It may have lasted for a fraction of a second but I could tell. The fear in his eyes then let place to anger.

Suddenly Sesshomarou got up and slammed his fist against a wall. He then screamed "there must be something we can do! Anything!"

I was shocked by his outburst but I felt the same. Then I had an idea, I could have hit myself for not thinking about it before.

"I think I can help" Sesshomarou looked at me with an incredulous glare, I could have been vexed if I did not know that he was a grieving father.

I loudly cleared my throat and explain "my father, Naraku is a poisonous spider demon, but my mother was a wind sorceress. Since my older sister and I both are wind youkai like my mother we are not immune to my father's poison. Therefore my mother taught us how to use plants to make antidotes, just in case. But these potions only work on beings with demonic blood."

"And what makes you think that this potion of yours can improve Rin's condition?"

"Simple really, this potion, boosts the demonic blood inside the person and increases his or hers healing abilities".

"I see. How long will it take for you to make the potion?"

"If I gather the plants tonight I can be done by sunrise" I answered already on my feet. I gently kissed Rin's forehead and nodded towards Sesshomarou before walking towards the door".

"Kagura" Sesshomarou called after me, I turned around and he added "Take Jaken and Ah Uhn with you". I grind my teeth at the idea of dragging the toad with me, and since I had no idea who Ah Uhn was, I nodded once more and went out.

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Interestingly enough, Jaken did not say a word while we went to gather the herbs in the forest. At first I was a little taken aback by the idea of riding a two headed dragon, but since I did not have time to find a nice feather…

We made quick work of finding the healing plants and went back to the castle. It did not take me long to ground everything and mix the potion. While I was waiting for the decoction to come to a boil, I kept muttering silent prayers, hoping that the potion will work on Rin.

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As I entered Rin's bedroom I could not help but notice that Sesshomarou did not even move. I handed him the small phial containing the dark brown mix.

He took it without a word, and kneeled next to Rin. He forced the potion down her throat. I got closer and waited patiently for the results to show. And they came instantly: Rin's breathing evened out and she stopped shaking.

I let out a deep sight as relief spread over my body. Sesshomarou looked at me and simply said "Thank you". I smiled at him, and of course he did not smile back, but his eyes had a certain warmth when he laid them on me.

I went out of the room and straight to bed for some much needed rest.

(A/N: This part was longer, happy? Part 5 will be up shortly it will be named **Getting better**)


	5. Getting better

A/N: Rejoice my dear hentai lovers, there's a nice piece of lemon goodness coming up

A/N: Rejoice my dear hentai lovers, there's a nice piece of **lemon** goodness coming up!!

Thank you for reviewing:

**Freak0star**

**Sychotic**

**Animeangelgotherwings**

_**Part V: Getting better**_

_**Disclaimer: **__Did I say I own Inuyasha? Sorry stupid joke…_

The next few days, while Rin recovered I got to take it easy. I would read to her while she staid in bed. Or we would make flower jewelry sitting under the shade in her garden. Sometimes Sesshomarou would sit with us, he would just look around us and listen to us but he never spoke.

For some reason, when he sat with us, I swear I could feel his gaze straying from either Rin or anything he was looking at to come and rest on me. Of course every time I would turn in his direction, he would be looking at something else. It was like a game, as if he teasing me and daring me to catch him in the act, and that was both exciting me and driving me crazy at the same time.

I have to admit that maybe it was all in my head, maybe I just wanted him to look at me, to notice me, to acknowledge my presence.

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One hot summer evening Rin and I were sitting next to the fountain in her garden when she told me "it's too bad my birthday party was cancelled".

I was stunned, what happened to the little girl who could not stand the simple idea of the date of her birthday approaching. I smiled and said "I take it your talk with Sesshomarou went well". I then asked myself _'when did I stopped calling him LORD Sesshomarou?'_

Rin turned around and looked at me with big golden eyes "how did you know he talked to me?" Damn I was busted.

"Well, I'm sorry but I told him what you said about you feeling guilty about your mother".

My little Rin smiled at me and hugged me tight before saying "thank you".

It never even crossed my mind to ask her what Sesshomarou told her to make her feel better, this conversation was private. Only to be shared by the father and his daughter.

Oh how I wish I could have memories of nice talks like that with Naraku, maybe before mother died we had conversations like this and I just don't remember.

"Are you okay Miss Kagura?" my little Rin asked me with concern.

"Yeah it's nothing, just tired that's all." I lied but she did not need to know that I was thinking about my messed up relationship with my father.

"Come on Rin let's go it's time for your lesson" I said forcing her to her feet.

"Do I really need to take lessons on how to become a Lady?" she asked me with a pout. Seriously I have to sit during some of her lessons, so I know how annoying and boring it can be. But I simply smiled and said "I'll race you to the door'.

"But Miss Kagura it is not fitting for a Lady to run" she said imitating Jaken with a grin. I could not suppress a giggle and she took advantage of it to start running.

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The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, and everything went on as usual. After I put Rin to bed I took a long nice bath in the castle springs and went to bed.

As I was slipping into the maroon yukata I slept in I heard a knock on my door. I winced, it was unusual for someone to visit me in my room, and especially so late. I quickly closed my yukata and hurried to the door trying to tie my obi as I walked.

With apprehension I opened the door and was shocked to see none other than Sesshomarou standing right outside my room, an indescribable expression playing in his eyes.

"Sesshomarou?" I managed to breathe out despite my dry throat, my sweating palms and my wildly beating heart.

"I wish to talk" he said and instantly I stepped aside to let him in. After he entered the room, I closed the door behind him, not knowing that this night would change my life forever.

"What do you want to talk ab…?" I ask as I turned around and stopped dead in my tracks. Sesshomarou's eyes shinned with an incredible light. He looked like a predator ready to jump on its defenseless prey. He licked his lips and advanced towards me.

Sesshomarou raised his hand and took a fistful of my still damp from my bath hair and to my surprise smelled it! I think I heard him whisper "wild flowers".

At this point I did not know what to do or what to say, but I knew that there was nothing I wanted more than to kiss him. Summoning all my courage, I rose on the tip of my toes and pressed my lips to Sesshomarou's.

As I was ready to step down, I felt Sesshomarou's arm snake behind me. He held me and forced me to stay in place as he slipped his tongue in my mouth. It was my first kiss and it felt weird…yet wonderful.

He released his hold on me, and as I looked up I noticed that some of my lipstick was spread all over his lips and I could not help but giggle.

"What is so funny wind witch?" Did he just call me a witch?! It made me laugh uncontrollably.

Sesshomarou looked at me for a while then grabbed me by the front of my barely tied yukata and kissed me senseless. My head was turning and I was dizzy, as I felt his lips crashing on mine over and over again.

When I opened my eyes I was shocked to realize that I was lying on my back on my futon with Sesshomarou standing between my legs taking his shirt off.

I barely had time to ask myself if this really was what I wanted, that I felt Sesshomarou kissing my neck. I decided then and there that this was EXACTLY what I wanted since the first time I saw him.

He barely had to make any effort to untie my obi, as I had wrapped my yukata in a hurry and did not have time to tie my obi properly. Sesshomarou gently opened my yukata, then tore apart my undergarments with his claws before I could say anything. He then stepped away and looked at my entire body going from my eyes to my feet, I wondered if he was assessing to see if I was worthy of him. But I pushed the idea aside as he started sucking on one of my nipples.

I felt waves of pleasure going throughout my body and I shivered as I felt one of his fingers stroking my nether regions. He chuckled lightly and kissed my cheek, then my jaw then my neck and my throat. He kissed his way down my body and stopped once he reached my hip. I was surprised and sat up to look down at what he was doing, when I felt his strong hand push me back on the bed.

I was about to speak when I felt him raise my hips and kiss my lower lips. My eyes widen in shock but the words ready to come out of my mouth just faded as I felt the most intense pleasure I had ever experienced in my life.

I gasped loudly when I felt one of his fingers enter me, and I simply lost it. I became so hot, it was as if someone just poured liquid fire in my veins. I tried to protest and tell him to stop, because I thought that if he went on any longer, I would 'explode', but the pleasure was too great.

I was not ready for the 'explosion' and it took me by surprise. It was so intense that I curled my toes and arched my back. I then took a hold of Sesshomarou's head and pulling on his wonderful silver hair I pushed him up to meet my lips, this time I was the one who kissed him senseless and he had no objections.

Once we pulled apart to breathe I managed to say "that was amazing". His eyes had a strange red tint in them and shined with a surprising light as he said "and there's still more to come". To prove his point Sesshomarou quickly discarded his hakama.

He positioned himself above me and nudged my legs opened with his knees and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist. He did not give me any warning as he buried his length inside me. I cried out in pain and felt tears rolling on my cheeks. Sesshomarou stilled his movement and wiped my tears. As he kissed me, I noticed that the pain was subsiding and leaving place to great pleasure.

I guess he sensed me relax, because he started to move inside me, slowly at first than faster and faster and faster. To the point that all I could do was moan loudly as I sank my claws in his back. After a couple more thrusts I felt like I was going to explode again but this time the 'explosion' would be even stronger.

And much stronger it was! All I could do was hold on to Sesshomarou and scream his name. I also heard him scream mine, as he released himself inside of me. We were both panting as he rolled off of me and laid next to me on the futon.

I was basking in the feeling of complete well being as I turned on my side ready to ask him what it was he wanted to talk about earlier. But I found him sleeping soundly.

I gingerly traced the markings on his face with my fingers as he lay sleeping. He was so handsome, and his face looked so relaxed and peaceful, all I wanted to do was lay in his arms and sleep.

I mischievously smiled at the idea. The hell with it he was asleep, and after what we've shared he wouldn't mind right? I gently laid my head on his chest and listened to his steady heartbeat as I fell asleep. Maybe one day I'll be able to make this heart beat for me, just for me…

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When I woke up the next morning I was in a great mood, a little sore but in a great mood still. But this changed quickly as I noticed that Sesshomarou was no where to be seen. I figured he probably had some business to attend to and had to wake up early.

I got dressed and went to wake up Rin, only to find her already dressed and ready for breakfast.

"Good morning Miss Kagura!" My little Rin exclaimed as soon as she saw me. I smiled at her and asked "Rin did you dress yourself?" which was a ridiculous question, considering that it took ME ten good minutes to dress her in her intricate kimomos".

"No, Yumi did it".

Yumi? Who the hell was that? I then noticed a young skinny girl standing in the room. I turned towards her and asked as nicely as possible considering the fact that this girl decided to dress MY Rin without my permission: "Good morning Yumi, would you care to tell me why you dressed Rin?"

"Orders of the Lord, from now on I am to take care of Miss Rin. Not you". I was so shocked that I did not know how to react. But Rin started crying and screaming. I kneeled in front of her and took her in my arms, trying to comfort her the best I could.

"Don't worry sweetie, I bet this is just a mistake. And you know Sesshomarou can say whatever he wants, he can't separate us, right?"

"Because I am your little Rin" she asked shyly.

"Yep. So know stop crying and go with Yumi, while I go have a little chat with your dad". Rin smiled at me and nodded.

I went out of her room and straight to Sesshomarou's study, I just could not understand after the beautiful night we shared together why would he relieve me of my duties?

**To be continued…**

(A/N: So how did you like it? Writing a lemon at the first person is the weirdest thing ever. I don't know if I'll do it again. It was really hard. But I'll do anything for my readers. Next part will be named **Unwanted freedom** and we will see why Sesshy replaced Kagura with Yumi).


	6. Unwanted freedom

(A/N: Here's the next part, hope you like it

(A/N: Here's the next part, hope you like it. It will be really long compared to the other parts posted so far. Oh and by the way, OOC warning especially for Sesshy.)

_**Part VI: Unwanted freedom**_

Thank you for the review:

**Sychotic**

**Freak0star**

_**Disclaimer: **_Unfortunately__I_ only own the plot, not the characters._

I knocked on the door of Sesshomarou's study, and entered without waiting for an invitation to do so. Yeah I was pretty mad.

"Kagura, saves me the trouble, I was about to summon you" Sesshomarou said looking up from some papers he was reading.

I ignored his gesture to invite me to sit in front of him. I was too mad.

"Why did you remove Rin from my care?" I asked bluntly.

Sesshomarou looked at me straight in the eyes, all trace of the warmth I saw in them was gone. He definitely was not the same as the man who had made love to me the night before.

He then said "Yesterday, when this Sesshomarou came to your room, it was to talk. Your father's debt has been fully repaid and you are now free. Therefore you can leave the castle as soon as you want. What happened between us was a mistake and will never happen again."

Sesshomarou than took back the paper he was reading before I entered. He was acting as if I was not in the room anymore.

It took me a good minute to grasp the meaning of his words and I felt as if someone had reached into my chest and took my heart out before squeezing it. My throat went dry and I was shaking. I was going to leave the castle and never see Rin and Sesshomarou again.

How could he say that to me after what happened between us? Did it mean anything at all to him? Maybe I was just another toy, to him, just some servant girl to spend an evening with.

The night we shared had meant so much to me, I felt used and I was disgusted Sesshomarou was just like the men who had tried to take advantage of me all these months ago. He just wanted a good fuck that's all! And I thought he was different, better than all the others. How wrong I was!

The thought of never seeing my little Rin again brought tears to my eyes, but I would not allow myself to cry in front of him. No! I would not give him the pleasure to see my tears. But I would let him feel my rage. I shook in anger when I spoke:

"You are just going to send me away like this? You just used me, you are no better then the men you rescued me from! And how stupid could I be, I thought you were different. To think that I'd waste my feelings on an insensitive jerk like you.

Poor Rin really poor Rin, with no mother and a bastard like you for a father, it's a miracle she is so charming. Really people call you 'Lord' and bow in front of you but you know what you are? Just a lowly piece of scum, that's all you are.

I don't know why I even wasted my time with you. Stupid me, I gave you my heart, my soul and my body. But it's over I finally saw you for who and what you really are, people were right you are a heartless bastard and I hate you!"

Once I was done I ran out, for I could not hold my tears any longer. For the entire length of my little speech I did not even look up to see Sesshomarou's reaction. And now I wished I did, was he hurt, sad, did he even care?

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I went straight to my room and started packing, but my hands were shaking and I could barely see in front of me because I was crying so much, so I had to stop trying to fold my clothes. I sat on my futon and buried my face in my hands and cried to my heart's contempt.

The irony of the whole situation did not escape me. I was finally free, and had managed to repay my father's debts. Shouldn't I be happy? No, of course not if my freedom meant I had to go back to my insensitive father and leave behind my heart in Sesshomarou's castle.

Some how the lord and his daughter took my heart, or maybe I was the one to give it to them. Did it really matter? The end result was the same: I was left heartbroken.

I lay on my soon to be ex futon, the same one Sesshomarou and I shared just a few hours ago, which I found ironic too. This only caused me to cry even harder, but those were tears of anger, how dare this man play with my heart like this?!

I heard somebody walk in and I quickly wiped my tears. I felt the person coming closer and closer, and when I finally raised my head I was shocked to see: Sesshomarou!

At this point a part of me wanted to jump in his arms and kiss him, another part wanted to slap him with all my strength, a third part wanted nothing more than to ignore him and cry until I used up all the water in my body. But I simply settled for standing up and looking straight in his eyes.

And to my horror they had turned completely red and the iris had a faint blue color. Sesshomarou was breathing hard, as if he was fighting himself for control over his inner demon. I just hoped it was a fight he would win, otherwise he would surely run me through with one of the two swords that hung at his hip in a fraction of a second.

Unfortunately I did not have any weapon to defend myself, and I seriously doubted that my winds would be able to hold Sesshomarou's demon form back. I needed to act and fast!

"No one ever dared speak to this Sesshomarou in such a way!" he finally told me after taking a deep breath. Thank God his eyes were slowly regaining their beautiful amber color.

"And so what, everyone needs to hear the truth some times" I said holding my head high, with in an act of bravery.

Sesshomarou advanced towards me once more, instinctively I stepped back and realized but too late that my back was now pressed against the wall and that I had no way of escaping.

And still Sesshomarou was walking, not that my room was that big, but he was walking slowly. Maybe he was taunting me or he was still battling inside him on whether to run me through with his sword or apologize to me.

I gulped once Sesshomarou reached me. He stopped right in front of me and put his hands on each side of my face. He then slowly lowered his right hand and caressed my left cheek, as his gold eyes peered in my crimson orbs. At this point I think I stopped breathing, his fingers were incredibly soft on my skin even if his eyes sill held their usual hardness.

"Sesshomarou" I breathed out.

After what felt like an eternity, he finally spoke "Kagura there are things I wish to say, but do not interrupt me. It is already hard enough for me to speak of such things, so do not make it harder". I simply nodded my head.

I wondered what he was going to do. Apologize? Help me pack faster? Kill me? Knowing him all alternatives were equally plausible

"What you said earlier was true". Forgetting my earlier promise I opened my mouth ready to argue, yeah the guy was a jerk but I was so mad that I said some pretty harsh things. But before I had time to let out any sound Sesshomarou pressed two fingers on my lips and silenced me.

"Wind witch, this Sesshomarou told you to stay silent." Without warning Sesshomarou then took me in his arms and squeezed me hard. He buried his nose in my hair and said:

"This wild flowers scent has been driving me crazy for months now. I wanted to send you away because I knew I would not be able to restrain myself any longer. You were right yesterday I took advantage of you, but seeing you so close and smelling you, and seeing you barely covered: I could not wait anymore. No woman has ever been able to arouse such feelings in me before.

The reason I made you Rin's care taker, was solely so that I would have an excuse to see you to my heart's contempt. But it only made things harder, being so close yet so far from you."

I could not believe my ears, so I was right all these times I felt Sesshomarou's gaze on me, he was looking at ME. I tried to break free from his embrace so that I could see his face, the expression in those beautiful golden eyes. But he would not let me go, he crushed me against his chest as if he was afraid I'd leave.

"Sesshomarou, what do you want from me?" I finally asked, giving up the idea of breaking free.

"Don't leave" I heard him whisper. If it was not for my demon hearing I might not have heard it.

What the hell is wrong with that guy?! He just dismissed me less than an hour ago and now he is asking me to stay. He was seriously getting on my nerves!

With a gust of wind I managed to push him away. He fell on his back on my futon and he was looking at me with a mix of anger irritation and maybe even surprise. Looks like I managed to unsettle the almighty taiyoukai.

"Do you think I'm some kind of toy? When you want me you pick me up than you throw me away when you get tired. Make up your mind, you can't tell me to leave and then turn around and ask me to stay, it doesn't work like that!"

Sesshomarou looked angry, really angry and for a moment I thought he might just cut me down with his sword but he did no such thing. On the contrary he spoke on a very calm and cold voice that sent shivers down my spine:

"Kagura, this Sesshomarou said all I needed to say. If you want to leave, then go and never come back" he then stood up and left the room, not looking back as if a few minutes ago he did not open his heart to me.

I was completely lost, did he love me back and wanted me to stay? Or did he just want a concubine to keep by his side for when he was in need for a release? Or maybe he did not even want me here? I was so confused, I hated the feeling of not knowing what to do, or what to expect.

I sat on my futon and looked to my half way full bag, should I keep packing and leave? Or should I unpack and go resume my life as it had been for the past few months? So many questions running in my head and still no answers!

The only thing I was sure of was that I loved Sesshomarou with all my heart. And then it hit me, I realized what I just did, Sesshomarou opened his heart to me and I blew him off. He confessed that he had his eyes on me for a long time, and also he wanted me to leave because he did not want to take advantage of me. In other words, I am a complete idiot. I could have slapped myself for my foolishness.

Once again I let my temper get the better of me, but this time the consequences were so much greater than a slap from my father. No I may have lost Sesshomarou forever.

I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I did not hear Rin come in. The little girl sat next to me and said "you can't leave Rin".

"I'm sorry but it might be my only choice".

"But I am sure there must be a way. Maybe if I talk to father he will let you stay". I could always use the coward's way out and have Rin beg Sesshomarou to let me stay. No, that was not my type, more like the kind of things Naraku would do.

I looked at Rin and smiled "No need, I will talk to him." I laced my words with a confidence I myself was far from having. But it was worth it to see my little Rin smile.

(A/N: Will Kagura convince Sesshy that he needs her to stay? Find out next time in the last part: **Smiles**)


	7. Smiles

Part VII: Smiles

_**Part VII: Smiles**_

A/N: Here you are my dear readers this is the last part so enjoy!!

Thank you for reviewing:

**Sychotic**

**Strgrl4eva**

**Crimsondawn365**

_**Disclaimer**_**: **If I owned Inuyasha, Sesshy would have freed Kagura and they'd be living happily ever after by now…

Rin and I walked hand in hand to find Sesshomarou. Okay I know it might look cowardly on my part not to want to face Sesshomarou alone, but Rin insisted to come along, and I just can't resist her puppy eyes look.

We found him in Rin's garden, sitting against my favorite tree, the one I would always sit under while watching Rin run around. Was it a coincidence or did he miss me?

"I see you are still here Kagura" Sesshomarou said his gaze still locked somewhere into space.

"Well, this new girl Yumi, she was chosen by Jaken right?" I asked him.

"Yes" he answered still not looking at me.

"Just as I thought, it just won't do. Jaken can not be trusted to make those kinds of decisions."

I then shifted my eyes from Sesshomarou's back to Rin who was standing besides me and said "Looks like you're going to be stuck with me. There is no way I'm going to leave you with some incompetent girl to look after you. That would be like undoing all the hard work I've put into taking care of you so far. I mean she braided your hair, she should have noticed that you look so much better with your hair let down".

I knew that attacking Rin's new care taker was a cheap shot, but I learned from the best. My father Naraku isn't really known for being the fairest man.

"Does that mean you are staying?" Rin asked with sparkling eye.

"It's not like I have a choice… Now then Rin, it's time for your calligraphy lesson, you better not be late or Master Miroku will make you write more lines".

Rin grimaced but made her way towards the castle. Now that my shield was gone, I had no choice but to face Sesshomarou.

"So, I take it you wish to stay?" he asked still not looking at me. I sighed and summoned all the courage in me and sat down next to him. Instantly my throat felt dry and my heart started beating so fast and loud that I was sure Sesshomarou could hear it.

"Yeah" I managed to choke out.

"Why?"

"I cleared my throat and said "It's not like I have anywhere to go, beside Rin really needs someone to look after…" I started, but a growl from Sesshomarou stopped me.

He finally turned around to face me and said "This Sesshomarou demands to hear the truth wind witch. Rin may accept your false reasons, but I am not one to be fooled so easily".

I was at a loss for words by his sudden display of emotions. Even if the emotions in question were surely a mix of anger and irritation, it was better than nothing right?

"This Kagura is getting tired of this Sesshomarou! You want to know why I want to stay, well isn't it obvious? It's because I LOVE YOU!"

Sesshomarou looked at me with surprise written all over his face. I could understand his shock. It's not like I planned to tell him about my feelings like this. If I had not been this angry, I would surely be blushing horribly.

"You love me? Why?" he asked me, I can't believe this guy, did he look in the mirror lately?!

"Because…" I had to look away from him, the way he was looking at me made me nervous and I was already blushing a nice shade of red.

Sesshomarou grabbed me by the chin and forced me to look at him and said "because…".Did he seriously expect me to finish this sentence? By the intense look he was giving me I guess yes.

"Because, you're handsome, strong and intelligent and I don't know. I just do." I Know I sounded like a pouting child, pathetic.

"No one ever said these words to me" Sesshomarou said his hand moving from my chin to my cheek, his thumb gently stroking my skin in circular motions.

I found it hard to believe, after all his family is so rich, he must have had a nice childhood. And he was married before and what about Rin. Then I realized I never heard Rin talk about love, could it be that it was a foreign notion to her? But surely her father must have said to her that he loved her…maybe not.

Damn, and I thought _I_ had family problems, even if Naraku and Kanna did not show me that much love, at least thanks to my mom I knew how it felt to love and be loved. I then promised myself that I would do the same for Rin, I would also teach her how to express her feelings to others, considering it was not a subject neither her father nor her fancy tutors could teach her.

"What about your first wife? Or your parents?" I asked him.

"I told you before my marriage with Sara was only for political reasons. We were betrothed at the age of five years old. My marriage with her was supposed to bring peace between the Western and Eastern Lands. I considered her a friend and I was very pained and felt guilty at her passing but there was no love between us. And my parents…the former Lord and Lady of the Western Lands were not the kind of persons to give displays of affection".

By the look in his eyes I could tell it was really hard for him to open up and talk of such things, so I refrained from making fun of him due to his similarity with his parents.

But since he was in a talkative mood, I figured I'd take advantage of it. So I asked "Sesshomarou why did you ask me to leave?"

He furrowed his delicate eyebrows and answered "I never did".

I was startled, how dare he blatantly lie to me? Now I was going to get mad, but I decided not to let my temper get the best of me anymore. So I breathed deeply and said "yes you did! When you removed Rin from my care."

"This Sesshomarou did not. I told you, you were free to go. And I appointed someone else as Rin's care taker because I did not want you to feel like you had to stay. On the other hand, if you wish to stay you are also free to do so".

I was stunned, and for a few seconds I processed what he told me. So basically, all along he just wanted me to make my own decision, he did not want me to feel like I was obliged to stay. Could it be that he wanted me to want to stay. All this was confusing me to no end. So I decided to bluntly ask him "Sesshomarou how do you feel about me?"

He averted his gaze, from mine and turned his head towards the other end of the garden. I figured it would not be a good sign and could already feel a painful lump forming in my throat.

"Kagura, you confuse and unsettle me. You dare say things to me that no one else would. I feel like you can see me for who I really am not just my title or my standing. In a way you even scare me, you are able to arouse feelings in me that I did not know could exist".

I was at a loss for words, he just opened his heart to me! I reached out, and turned his face towards mine, I needed to see his eyes, those beautiful amber orbs which could tell me if he really meant what he was saying. And what I saw in there melted my heart: I saw fear and uncertainty.

So many words and emotions were raging in my head and I knew just the way to make him understand how I felt.

I gently pressed my lips to Sesshomarou's. What I intended to be an innocent kiss quickly became passionate and I could feel his hands grazing my sides. I tilted my head back as he trailed kisses from my lips to my neck.

Sesshomarou then locked our lips in a passionate kiss and as I was feeling the same tingling and excitement as the night before spread over my body, but this time it felt more emotional, as if Sesshomarou was trying to tell me of his feelings through his kisses, or maybe it was once again all in my head. But I doubt it, I don't know how to explain it, but it was so beautiful it almost made me cry.

Our little make out session was suddenly interrupted by someone loudly clearing their throat behind us.

I winced and quickly turned around to see none other than the toad demon Jaken.

"Wench, what are you still doing here? Didn't my Lord tell you to leave the castle at once?"

I was surprised by Jaken's interruption, but soon understood as I realized that from where he was standing he could not see Sesshomarou sitting next to me, as he was hidden by the large tree we were sitting against. I smiled, if the imp found out what was going on he would be sure to have a heart attack.

"And what if I decided to stay?" I answered him with a nonchalant shrug.

"Do not force me to use strength to remove you from the premises" the imp spat.

"Do you seriously think YOU can defeat me?" I sent a small gust of wind to make the hat on the top of his bald head fall.

"You bitch, behold the power of the Staff of two heads!" he screamed pointing his weird cane on me. I was about to retort, when Sesshomarou decided to let Jaken know he was there, he stood up and walked between me and the imp.

"Jaken you are never to either harm or address Kagura in such a disrespectful way ever again. Am I clear?"

The imp gulped loudly as he looked at his master towering over him, and I had to stiffen a laugh. Sesshomarou than sent him a cold glare and raised his hand, needless to say Jaken disappeared in record time.

I stood up and looking at Sesshomarou I asked with a fake pout "I wish you could give me a lesson in toad repelling."

"Kagura, I am afraid it is a skill bestowed at birth" he answered with a shrug. My heart stopped, did Sesshomarou just make a joke!

"Did you…did you just make a joke?" I finally asked not able to refrain myself. His answer was letting out a small smile and as soft chuckle as he looked at my astonished face.

Even if his smile was small in appearance it was big in meaning, and left me breathless. Sesshomarou tilted his head to the side as he started walking back to the castle: I understood he wanted me to follow.

And I followed him, I would follow him anywhere and anytime. He may not have said he loved me, but I knew it was just a matter of time. And I could wait, because until he voiced his feelings for me, I would cherish the memory of his smile, the one I was the only one to have ever seen.

**THE END**

A/N: And there you have it. I can't believe it's over. It was a nice challenge to not only write at the first person but also post a chapter everyday… Maybe I'll use this format again. Anyway goodbye my dear readers and don't forget to leave me a review. Oh and also go check out my other fan fictions (I just posted a nice long chapter of 'Jump over the wall of freedom')!!

Saphira404


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